Tuesday, 13 October 2015


Clear, but cold. I've started to think about the consequences of winter - including that period when it's easier to buy new socks than wait for them to dry. I gave away my tumble dryer earlier in the year after working out what it was costing me. A wise move, but not a welcome one.

I have my final hospital appointment today at the Maxio Facial clinic. It will be fine, and then after that I'll be 'OK' again. I think I must be. last night I lost my temper for the first time in months and today I feel quite depressed - so business as usual. Today's work is a write off - the appointment is in the middle of the day and the time spent there - to and from cut's the day in half. I'm back in the studio tomorrow.

After a conversation with someone on Facebook last night I made the terrible, fatal mistake of looking at property prices where I used to live. Liverpool is still quite cheap, Whitechapel is like Fulham and one of my old neighbours in Brighton has put their house on the market for £750.000. I could have retired on that. Work is good, but very poorly paid and unstable. I have no idea what's coming next. I'm going to try not to think about it too much.

I'm dealing with someone at the moment who has become increasingly smug and self-important over the last year or so - their ego is unbearable.

Am half way through a very good BBC film about Philip Larkin at the moment - trying to get myself into the right frame of mind to watch the other half.

I was in the garden early this morning and I thought 'this actually looks pretty good' - everything in there I planted myself - I have proper actual trees and architectural grasses and plants that are up to 8 feet high, and it's evergreen. Of course - if I sold the house - the owner would instantly rip the whole lot up.

I'm getting increasingly frustrated by the mess of politics in this country - it's all rubbish. I can understand why people get drawn to nonsense fringe groups. I left the labour party when Blair came to power and spent quite a few years in the Greens, but they are rubbish here - the temptation is literally to shut down, board up the windows and wear a tin foil hat.

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