Saturday, 22 July 2017

An update.

Yep. I know - I haven’t been around much recently. I’ve had a lot on my plate - I’m working really hard and frankly - I don’t seem to enjoy talking about myself any more. I’ve been writing this blog now for 10 years and I can’t quite remember why I started. I often think about writing something but my attention wanders or I forget what I was going to say.

In brief. 

Quite a lot has happened over the last couple of months. The election was a farce - and to top it off, because I gave some professional help to the independent candidate I was formally expelled from the Labour party by some legal department. Personally I found the whole thing hysterical. There is no point in my pretending I have any faith in Corbyn - I don’t and I will never come round to him. I think he’s a disaster waiting to happen. Sadly - that has meant me falling out with quite a few people.

I had my birthday in London with two old friends from school and their families and a few close friends from London. It was actually very nice. I don’t socialise much now but it was a lovely day.

I had the two year anniversary of my accident. I’m still having trouble with my memory - and I still get confused and stammer a bit when I’m stressed (usually with people I don’t know). I also still have that deeply frustrating and embarrassing thing where I get very emotional and tearful for the slightest reason. All typical, dull brain injury stuff. I’m used to it all now. The biggest problem is that I tend to blot things out - like money - when I don’t have the mental capacity to deal with something. This resulted in the deeply upsetting incident when I came home to find someone waiting to remove my furniture to pay for the charges on being 2 months late with my council tax over a year ago - even though I paid the bloody thing off early in the end. It was quite frankly a fucking nightmare and I still don’t understand what was going on - they were lucky I had the cash in the bank (just) It cleaned me out. 

As soon as I get paid by anyone, presuming they do pay me (I am on my 2nd non payer of the year) the money has to go straight out again. I can’t work any harder than I already do. Project creep is an absolute killer at the moment - things that should take weeks are taking months. I’ve done a lot of very good work recently - it seems to be my main focus and the only thing I get much satisfaction from. Which is useful because it’s basically all I do.

One strange thing  - I had a birthday card from my oldest friend - except she died just over a year ago. She’d written them and arranged for her sister to send them. It was quite overwhelming and upsetting - but good at the same time.

I took the older dog to the vets and we had a long talk about his age (17 - ancient for a greyhound) - his general good physical health but declining mental health - his teeth and the small tumor in his jaw. We have decided to let him be for the time being - he’s never going to cope with aesthetic and he’s quite happy - there is no point in treating his cancer. He’s the human equivalent of about 90.

I’m really tied and run down - I need a break but I don’t have the time and I certainly can’t turn work down, 

I went to see ‘Angels In America - pt1’ broadcast live from the National Theatre at my local Odeon. It was superb. I hated the TV film version - but this was quite something. Andrew Garfield in particular. I would never have been able to afford to see this in London, so the broadcasts are a Godsend. Alas - it was ruined a bit by the awkward woman who insisted they show the 2 foot high subtitles throughout - the manager apologised and gave us all free tickets for part 2 next week - which saves my 15 quid and takes the edge off things.

I had an email conversation with the now former best friend of someone I went out with years ago who took a lot of money from me - seems like they have done the same again (and again and again). I’m amazed there is anyone left to bleed dry.

The weather has been very good but I haven’t done much cycling - It’s actually been too hot for me so I’ve avoided it - and I’m not feeling too energetic, but I could do with more exercise.

If you want to keep up with what I’m doing - I am on Instagram and I actually really like it (for a late adopter) but I don’t tweet much - it’s not a very good environment for me. I will try and keep up on here - but mostly I just feel like keeping my head down, the world is so messy at the moment - I don’t need to add to the chaos.


Anonymous said...

Good to hear you're ok. In the weird virtual world I feel like I know you and always enjoy your posts. Hope the finances improve, Natalie

Steerforth said...

I'm glad you haven't called it a day. You might be bored with your blog, but the rest of us aren't. Just write when you feel like it.

Re: politics, it makes me really miserable to see how inflexible people have become, particularly abour Brexit. Depending on which echo chamber you inhabit, the EU is either the source of all evil or a wonderful philanthropic society, when all I can see is that the truth is probably more complicated. But it's all become so tribal, you either have to be totally for or against.

It's to Labour's discredit that they expelled you - whatever happened to their claim to be a broad church?

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